I want you to know that I pray for you everyday. You’re so precious to me. One of the things I pray for is that you would make wise decisions for God, throughout your lives.
Today I want to talk to you about something that will help you so much in making wise decisions, and that is the friends you have.
Yesterday I wrote that you can learn a lot about your potential future spouse by observing their friends. You can also learn a lot about your future by observing your friends.
If you look at your friends and think they seem like they aren’t heading anywhere, chances are you’re about to come to a standstill too.
If you look at your friends and you see people on the path to life and life to it’s fullest, then there is a good chance you’re on that same path with them.
1 Corinthians 15:33 says that bad company corrupts good character, the opposite is also true, good company helps build great character.
So… here are a few things that might help you in choosing friends, and please know this- there are very few things in the world that are more important than the friends you choose. So please, for your sake, use the wisdom I know you will have, to surround yourself with the right ones. I hope this wisdom might help too.
1. Surround yourself with the kinds of friends that will build up character in your life, not take it away.
2. Ask yourself- will this person lead me closer to God, or further away?
3. Have both Christian and not yet Christian friends. As a Christian you are called to be salt and light. Salt = flavor. You are meant to be the flavor, or the difference, in your friends’ worlds. They should look at you and say- “that person is different, in a good way!” Light = guidance. Are you acting as the guide, because your friends need you to be! If you have only Christian friends, it means the light that is needed is being wasted. Think of it like a torch turned on in the middle of the day, useless. But in the middle of the night- powerful! Be light kids, but don’t get so surrounded in darkness that your light starts to flicker… see this next point.
4. If your friend(s) aren’t Christians, then this is a great question to ask; “Am I the influencer, or am I being influenced?” If you’re being influenced and not being the influencer, retreat, regain your strength, get some great accountability, then head back into that circle and do some influencing!
5. Be friends with many, but go deep with a few. I always have the view of the more friends the merrier. Your Mum and I had over 300 people at our wedding. But you can’t go deep with everyone, in your attempt to do so, you will end up being shallow with everyone. I often lean this way, and it’s not healthy. Have a few friends that are your lifelong friends and keep close.
6. Make the most of every season. This one was a big one for me, and it very well may be for you, knowing my tendency to move around. Let me explain. When I was a kid I moved nearly every year. After a while, I decided I didn’t want to make friends, for fear of losing them. Do you know what that meant, I was lonely and upset. I’ve learned since then, that whether you are with someone for an hour, a year, or a decade, make the most of the time you have and be a friend. I have a friend that regretted not getting to know me as he was worried I would move. Then, a month before I moved he decided he wanted to be my friend. We had a blast together for the whole month, and then that was it, I moved. He said, “I only wished I’d gotten to know you sooner instead of living in fear.” Don’t live in fear, be a friend and find a friend in every season.
Once again kids, I could type for hours more, but I will have to leave it here. Please hear me, our time on earth is short. Eternity is a very long time. Have friends that will help guide you to eternity, and that you can guide to eternity. Keep your relationship with Jesus at the center and you will be just fine.
I’m so proud of you both.
I love you so much.
About the series:
I’m 29 right now, but soon I’ll be 30. 30 sounds so young to some, but to me right now, it’s feels old! It’s a real milestone.
It’s sounds funny to say this but the closer I get to 30 the more I think about what legacy I’ll leave my kids.
To be completely honest, the closer I get to 30, the more I realize I won’t always be here for them, one day I’ll go to heaven and get to be with Jesus face to face, and they’ll have to walk this earth with God in their hearts, the Holy Spirit as their comforter and guide, and Jesus as their example and intercessor, but they won’t have me here. So, for the times they might wonder, what would Dad have to say about this… I’m writing them a blog a day for 30 days. They might not need it now, but if they ever do, I hope it speaks to them.